My best friend and I often talk about when we’re “grown-up”. We talk about how we’ll behave and the things we’ll be able to do. We’ve been talking about this for about 14 years. It seems no matter how old you are there are people around you that are far better at being an adult. You know the ones, they go to the post office in their lunch hour, they know when the boiler is due to be serviced and who to call for that: they’ve really got their shit together.
This time next year I’ll be 30, married and a home owner – by many measures I will technically be a grown up. But there’s still a long way to go. I present to you a very honest list and pray that some of you identify with at least some of it. I can’t be the only non-grown up grown up?
15 reasons I’m not a grown up yet.
- I sometimes eat naan bread and mango chutney in the bath. I know this sounds weird but you really can’t knock it until you’ve tried it.
- I paint over my chipped nail polish rather than taking it off and starting again.
- I have been known to neglect my laundry to the point that I end up wearing a bikini instead of underwear… I blame my job for this as much as myself.
- I worry a lot about what other people think. Hopefully this post is a big step towards getting past that. (You don’t admit to point 3 if you’re still hung up on point 4.)
- I drink too much on a Friday night and it wipes out my Saturday… and Sunday.
- I generally avoid the doctor/dentist until something has turned an unusual colour. Actually I should probably register with a dentist…
- I regularly allow the car to get so messy I’m embarrassed to offer people a lift.
- I avoid exercise like it’s the plague. I know it’s normal to avoid things that are painful but I probably should do something. Anything.
- I fall asleep with my make up on. Grown ups tell me that this all kinds of bad
- I still say yes to things a) I don’t want to do or b) I haven’t got the time to do. Free time is precious and I have so many lovely people I enjoy spending time with I really don’t need to try and please absolutely everyone all the time.
- I always wear odd socks.
- I waste too much time online. Too. Many. Cat. Videos.
- I shop in Primark. Not the occasional piece – about 70% of my wardrobe. I even went to wedding in the Summer wearing a Primark dress and heels. When will I learn? Buy cheap by twice. Also the whole unethical child labour thing…
- I drink warm milk far more than anyone over the age of 3 probably should.
- I don’t own an iron. According to my best friend this means I definitely don’t qualify for adult status. But really, what do people actually iron?